Can someone explain #ButIVaccinate to me?

I stepped away from social media for a few weeks and have no idea what the freaky frack is going on with this stupid hashtag. Is this some mommy war shit? A blatant attempt at straight up mom-shaming?

Like, you are such a horrible mom, please take a moment to reflect on and confess what a terrible parent you are and wallow in it. Are you up to your ears in dirty laundry? Did you miss the first 20 minutes of the school play because your boss wanted you in a meeting? Did you forget about the tooth fairy money two nights in a row?

Never fear! We, the pharmaceutical industry (with assistance from your national health department and our paid mommy bloggers), hereby grant you permission to cut yourself some slack because lady, at least you vaccinated.

Your child exists on mac & cheese but at least you vaccinate? Well no shit, Sherlock. Dairy and gluten acts like a drug in your child. How is a vaccine going to counter that?

Your kid got sent to detention because you forgot to give him his ADHD meds but at least you vaccinate? Are you joking?

You let your toddler walk around all day with an upper lip encrusted with snot and didn’t bother to clean her up but at least you vaccinate? Truly shocking. I wouldn’t have guessed.

Your son spent 12 straight hours on the iPad this weekend but at least you vaccinate? You know what this sounds like, right?

I saw a tweet that read, “At least we get the big things right, like vaccinating.”

Um, no. The big things are giving your child love and attention, healthy food, and plenty of room and freedom to play. Providing an education, clean drinking water, a safe home, and raising them with respect.

I’d also argue that “the big things” include limiting their exposure to endocrine disruptors, preservatives, heavy metals and unnecessary antibiotics, but maybe that’s just me.

How does injecting your child with mercury and aluminum make up for the fact that they’ve eaten nothing but Ritz Bits for the past five days? Did you think you were injecting nutrients?

The biggest parenting fail I can think of is living in ignorant bliss despite the warning bells going off in the media that vaccines are so great they’ve got to be shoved down our throats against our will and anyone who thinks otherwise is a nut case.

The only one getting immunity from vaccines is the pharma industry, but you vaccinate.

I’m going to leave you with the words of Jane Know It All who wrote the greatest poem in the history of poems that sums up how I feel about people who perpetuate pharmaceutical propaganda.

“Just saw another story about suing the unvaxxed.
Friend asked, “When did Americans become such pussies [over measles]?” and I replied, “When their Pharma overlords told them to be.”
Afraid of measles?
you’re an asshole who has never heard of Vit A and proper nutrition –WAIT! I take that back!
YOU morons SHOULD fear measles.
Consider most of these parents who fear the unvax’d think proper nutrition is a fucking HOT POCKET and a Flintstones vitamin.”

But at least you vaccinate.

Update: it looks like the ladies of TMR already investigated this ill founded campaign. Click over and give them a read.